Oh Hi There! This Is Me And My Story.

It started off innocent enough.  I was motivated and had the mentality that if I just worked hard enough I could reach my goal of becoming a professional ballet dancer.  I never meant to become disordered in my mind and body.  I never knew becoming obsessed and mean could be a side effect of trying to be my very best.  Yet there I was broken down on the same dance floor that once provided me with so much joy and passion.  How did I get here? What went wrong?  Those were just some of the tough questions I was faced with when living a lie finally became too much to bear.  

My story is not unlike millions of other girls who strive for perfection and end up accidentally falling pray to an eating disorder.  For me, I remember feeling a sense of excitement when I first started to restrict what I ate.  I thought it would bring me closer to my dreams; that if I just got my body together I would really be able to shine.  That kind of thinking is so alluring for a young girl who has a one track mind and the ability to stick to goals, no matter the pain it might cause in the moment.  

The sad thing is, it wasn't a difficult transition to make!  After-all when you are in High School literally all you have to do is look to the girl next to you and chances are you will see some crazy eating habits.  It's almost as if we were all secretly living the same lie. Walking the halls smiling, being a good student in the classroom, and all the while secretly harboring some real deep rooted body image issues.  

Still I was lucky. I never ended up having to go to the hospital and I don't have any scary pictures of my bones protruding out.  That being said, it ended up becoming a situation where I couldn't go from one moment to the next without obsessing over my body and thinking about ways to eat less.  Even dance was just another reminder that I wasn't enough.  For all it's amazing qualities, at the end of the day, it ended up becoming just another area of my life that was so inexplicably linked to what I looked like.  

The day I realized I could no longer be apart of the dance world, I felt so free.  I knew it wasn't going to fix everything but it was a new beginning; a chance to write my own story in my own way.  I discovered so much about myself, found new passions, and regained a new/healthier relationship to both ballet and my body.  

  Although I am still not perfect when it comes to body image, I know that perfect is not what matters.  Each day I choose to commit to loving myself as I am; and even if I am not always successful, I know it's my intention of self acceptance that really matters. 

When I think of all the time I wasted preoccupied on something so trivial as what I look like and trying to get thinner, it honestly makes me angry!  Just think of where we could all be as a society of woman, if we replaced the energy we put into obsessing over our bodies, into our careers and treating ourselves/others with kindness?  Now more than ever we need to stand  united, confident, and sure in our bodies. 

To help make that shift, below are my top 3 favorite tools to gaining a healthier relationship to your body.  

1. Replace your negative body attitude with Gratitude

2. Write down qualities about your body that you love that only have to do with it's functionality, not its physique. 

3. Spend time in mediation giving love to the areas of your body that you feel insecure about

If you are struggling with your body, know that it doesn't have to be like that forever!  If you hear a quiet voice inside you, saying there has to be another way to live, listen up!  We only have this one life to live and I believe we all have the right to make it one that is filled with love. 

Body Postivity is a real movement that is only getting stronger day by day. So, what are you waiting for? Say goodbye to your former life of insecurities, it's time you rewrite your story and fill the pages with love and total acceptance for your body and for the special talents that only you have to share with the world.    

How To Live Your Most Body Positive Life Yet

I want you to take a moment right now, and close your eyes...eyes closed? Good!  Now I want you to visualize what it would be like if you lived in a world where body shame didn't exist.  How would you feel? What would you do differently if you weren't being held back by society's ideas of what pretty, acceptable, and healthy looked like?  Would you feel more brave and free to go after your dreams? If you said yes and are feeling a longing to live in such a world, you're not alone!  

I have felt the pain that comes with living in a world that places beauty and being thin in the highest of regard.  I also know the struggle of realizing that we are more than just objects to be manipulated, and yet still having to cope with the fact that most of the world hasn't quite come to the same conclusion.  It certainly doesn't help either that this whole body shame thing isn't something you can just get away from.  In fact TV., magazines, and advertisements, make it a point to remind us at every turn that we are certainly not OK as we are and that we better get to "working" on our bodies asap! 

The thing is though, it's not enough to just be disappointed in the way that things are.  In order to make any real change, we need to make sure that we are speaking up and doing our part to spread the ideas of Body Love, and Body Acceptance; and the cool thing is that we don't even need to do anything crazy to make that happen!  Simply taking small steps to make sure your life is as body positive as possible is one of the greatest contributions you could make to creating a more loving and Body Positive place for all humans to live in.    

Below I have listed some easy things you could do right now to create  your most body positive life yet! 

1. Curate Your Social Media Page- This is possibly the biggest thing you could do for yourself!  Take the time and go through your social media pages and delete/unfollow anyone who  promotes a lifestyle that you don't believe in, or just plain doesn't make you feel good about yourself when you see their feed pop. Comparing and tearing yourself down doesn't do anybody any good!  Keep your feed positive and up lifting.

2. Be Aware Of What You Are Watching On TV - If you find that a certain actress on a show prompts you to question if you are pretty enough/thin enough, then don't watch it!  There are plenty of awesome shows out there that you can choose from. 

3. Listen to Body Positive Podcasts- This is like getting your own personal body positive coach for the cost of nothing! It really is so validating and honestly life changing, to constantly hear other people talk about the same ideas you believe in. 

4. Get Rid Of Clothes That No Longer Fit- Seriously why do we do this to ourselves?! It's like a game of torture that we play, and for what reason?  There are plenty of situations that we have no control over that remind us of the fact that we live in a skinny is good, and fat is bad world; our closets shouldn't be one of those reminders!! Only keep clothes that when you put them on, make you feel really good.

5. Have A My Body, My Business Attitude With Those Around You- It's true you don't have a lot of say in what others think, but that doesn't mean you have to be privy to it!  Make it super clear to those around you that you are not OK with any comments, good or bad, in regards to your body..because it is after all YOUR body. 

Those are just some small changes that you could make right now, that when put all together, has the ability to completly change your every day experience with the way you view not only your body, but the whole world around you!  I know that together, we can make a better, more accepting life for those around us, and for generations to come. 

What's Your Body Saying?

I recently wrote a blog all about listening to your body and honoring what it tells you to do.  It all sounds lovely in theory, but the reality is, most of us don't even know where to begin when it comes to being able to hear what our bodies are telling us.  

With the way that our lifestyles are so interconnected to technology, it's no wonder we are having such a difficult time figuring out how to listen to what our bodies are saying!  It seems like technology was made to distract us and keep our minds on a constant buzz.  You can watch reality tv any time of the day, make videos on your phone, and even take pictures that make you look like a fairy!  With all of this fun entertainment literally at the tips of our fingers, it's hard to even try to focus on what's going on in the inside!  

Being able to tune out the noise around us is key in connecting to our feelings, and luckily for us, there are plenty of fun and entertaining ways to do just that!

Listed below are some of my favorite tools for getting really clear on how I am feeling, so that I can make choices that support me, mind, body, and soul.  Give them a look and see how they resonate with you! 

Top Favorite Ways To Get Clear On What Our Bodies Are Telling Us

1. Stop. Drop. And Breathe - That's right, it's easy as just breathing!  You don't even have to meditate! Just bringing your awareness to your breathe can be enough to eliminate the chatter in your mind, and get you connected to how you are feeling. My go-to breathe work is to inhale for 4 counts, hold for 7 counts, and then exhale for 8. 

2. Have a dance party - I told you getting clear about how you're feeling would be fun!  Getting up and moving, especially to a favorite song, can be the best way to shake out the opinions of others, and get you really clear about what you actually desire. If you really want to commit to this one, you could even use a hair brush as a microphone...it's quite helpful in making you feel like the real Beyonce. 

3. Write. Just write. And then write some more. - So this one is pretty straight forward! Get our your pen, a piece of paper, and without editing what comes to mind, just write it down.  To freely express what's been locked up deep down inside of you, is one of the most cathartic things you could do for yourself!  If you feel a huge weight on your shoulder, try writing and watch as your worries lift with every word you write.  When you clear away the cobwebs of built up emotions, it is so much easier to operate from a place intuition.  

My hope is that you use these tools when you're feeling out of sorts and disconnected from being able to hear what your body needs!  So when you are having a hard time figuring out what you want to eat, how you want to move, or even what you want to say to a loved one; I hope you take the time to breahe, to dance  it out, and/or free write.  This is your life to live, and you deserve to live it from a place of sacred intuition and deep connection to your soul and heart.  

Intuitive Movement. What it is and Why everyone Should be doing it.

As 2016 comes to a close it's time to take inventory of the past year, set up new goals for the upcoming year, and make fitness resolutions that we swear we'll actually keep.  Unfortunately those fitness resolutions normally only lead to us to a place of exhaustion and disappointment.  Yet time and time again as the New Year rolls around we all scammer around the web and search for what the "experts" promise will change our bodies and thus lead us to the life of our dreams!   I am here to say STOP!   Don't believe the madness! It doesn't have to be another year of chasing pointless, out of reach body perfection. This year really can be completely trans-formative and you don't even need to  sign up for a single boot-camp class! Sound good? Want to get started on your new path where weight-loss goals don't dictate your every move? You can do just that and it's as simple as making this one scared promise: I promise to move my body in ways that make me feel good and commit to intuitive movement only.

So lets talk about what exactly intuitive movement is.  Intuitive movement is choosing to move your body in ways that honor how you're feeling.  So if your body is screaming to be stretched, you take a yoga class.  Perhaps you wake up and don't feel like doing any kind of "exercise" at all but still want to move your body, you could go for a walk.  Maybe it is one of those days where you have a whole lot of energy and so you take a class that is going to push you and make you sweat. So really it comes down to putting your faith back in your body and trusting that it  always knows what's best for you.    

We have been so programmed as a society to really fear our body and believe in everything and everyone but our own intuition! The truth is, the only sure way to start to feel at peace in our skin is to put our energy into falling in love with exactly how our body is right now. That means deciding to be okay with our physique regardless of the size of our jeans, the number on the scale or what our distant relative might have to say about it. Now committing to intuitive movement isn't a magic pill for getting rid of all those body related issues, but it is certainly a start!  

So as you move into the new year, choose your workouts one breath  and one day at a time; and know that there is no better leader of your body than you!  It's time you take back the power and start believing in yourself again!  You got this :)